I have not been putting what matters first lately. I was doing so good with my daily alone time with God - but here lately I have let work, the kids school, the house, everything else take presence over my time with God. I use to have my quiet times with God on the way in to work - I just chat away with God as if he was sitting in the passenger seat. However these past months it's been few and far between chats. I got in my car and something came over me - I just sat in my car for a few minutes and closed my eyes and I start to cry... how could I have put everything before Him - I felt so much guilt. I dried my eyes and said well lets do this God - I apologized and went on with my chats - it was like I never stopped talking to Him - everything just poured out - it felt good! One thing I have noticed I have been struggling with is looking at what I don't have: house, clothes, money, etc (all material!). For example last night Eric was telling about his day describing a house he showed and how much I would love it - so my curiosity sat in and I had him show me - WOW talk about a house, I feel in love - immediately I started comparing what that house has that mine doesn't and I start thinking if only I could have that house instead. Eric tells me we have everything we need here - we don't need a bigger newer house - I laughed it off and agreed - but deep down I was only seeing what I don't have and not what I DO have! This morning in my chat with God - I talked about this and I asked him to help me focus on what I have, not what I think I need/want... I started thinking of all the things that we do have - what came to mind was nothing material - it was all about what each of us in our family has that he has blessed us with. So yes that house I looked at may be bigger, have a double oven, extra rooms etc - but it's not what I need - everything I have it what I need. As I closed my talk with God - I turned the radio back on and one of my favorite songs on the radio right now came on. I never really listened to it - I just liked the beat and the happiness of the song - this morning I listened and as I jammed and sang along - I laughed at the end and glanced up and said "Well Played God Well Played" - "I have everything I need Nothing I don't...."
Amazing when we really listen - he does talk to us in all different ways we just have to be willing to put in the time with him and listen.
(with my technical challenged self I couldn't get the YouTube video of the song to play - but here is the link instead if you want to take a listen!)
