Thursday, August 28, 2014

Mom for YOUR family is the best kind....

Lately I have been seeing, reading, hearing about life of a stay at home Mom vs working Moms.  First this is NOT a post that says one is better than the other!  When I created the blog years ago it was a way to put my thoughts, feelings, memories etc so one day the twins could read about it.  With that being said, I want Trayce and Paige to know that although I wasn't the stay at home Mom I was a Mom who still loved them and didn't choose a career over her kids...I just chose what worked for our family!  Isn't that what we all do for our families???....

When we got pregnant and even found out we were having twins it was never in my mind to be a stay at home Mom - I always knew I wanted to work.  Does that make me a "bad Mom" or a someone who doesn't love as much?  Some said to me (yes they really did say this!) - "Don't you love your kids enough to stay at home with them", "You are working to just pay daycare "," you must not be the baby/kid type", "You're just a secretary - why work"... and really the list could go on what I have been told over the years.   But, if I could go back and change if I worked or not - I would have done it all over again.  I have enjoyed working.  I like the idea of having a career life plus a family life and having to balance it.  Which sometimes I balance it better then others - but it is still a balancing act.  I do know I could not have it "all" without Eric - he is the boat in our marriage that keeps us a float and with God as our Anchor we are sure to keep going strong!

Some say that working Moms get a break from being a Mom, but I don't know about you but being a Mom doesn't stop once you drop your kids off at the sitter, daycare, school etc.  Some say our priorities aren't in the right order for our kids - but in all honesty who says your priorities are the same as mine???  I may not be at home with them 24/7, but I do know that my love is there 24/7.
  
I think we can look at all the choices you make with raising kids - we all do it different!  Having kids isn't a cookie cutter situation - it's a lets take what we got and make it work kind of deal!  Some breast feed, some use formula.  I tried to breast feed - it lasted for 10 days (then I heard from men and women - you just aren't trying hard enough, you didn't give it long enough...again another list I could go on about).  News alert... that was the worst 10 days of my life!!!  There was no bonding, not a special time, I would "feel the connection" etc blah blah blah stuff I was told by the lactation nurse!!!  Paige literally made me cry each time - I haven't had a mammogram yet, but I can imagine that is what it was like!  They were on a strict schedule so guess what - they feed at the same time - yep I was holding two footballs and leaning back praying they would hurry up!  Needless to say 10 days was AWESOME for me to last that long!!!!  Okay - back to the list of comparisons! Store bought baby food, your own home made baby food.  Again I tried the make our own baby food - there is a reason Gerber has been around forEVER!!!!  cry it out, cosleeping, pacifier, glass bottles, etc... the list really can go on and on.  But at the end of the day - we are ALL Moms and we love our kids in our own way.  We do what we need to do for OUR families!  When younger moms ask me questions on what to do or how to do it - I always share my experience but I always  elaborate on "do what works for YOU and your baby!!!"  Just because it works for one doesn't mean it works for all!  I strongly believe we should be a MOM for our own family and not try to be like anyone else, just bc one Mom does it one way doesn't make you or me a bad Mom bc we do it differently. I chose to be the Mom of our family and what works for our family is the best kind of Mom for our family.

Life is hard, life goes by quickly, I am sure I am guilty of it giving advice when I shouldn't, but if we all tried to motivate, strengthen, and encourage eachother especially MOMS we may get through this life alot easier and even with a little less guilt!  In 1 Thessalonians 5:11 it tells us  "Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing."

At some point today - build someone up, encourage them - you never know what they are feeling, what guilt, what is weighing on their hearts today - but by you saying good job Mom - regardless if you are a working mom or stay at home mom - we all need a little bit of encouragement!

Keep smiling and keep praying - I know I am!!!!

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